Batman vs. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2019)

Director: Jake Castorena

Cast: Troy Baker, Eric Bauza, Darren Criss, Kyle Mooney

Have I Seen it Before: Nope.

Did I Like It: I’ve been on the record about not liking many of the string of DC animated films. The more essential the Batman story, the more epic in scope, the more disappointing the film ends up being*.

That’s kind of the beauty part of this film. The crossover comic putting the Dark Knight and the Heroes in the Half Shell barely meant much of anything, and the film has little to live up to, and passes those expectations.

First of all, the movie opens with Barbara Gordon (Rachel Bloom) handling things in the way only she can. I submit that there is no other character in the popular culture who is more mistreated than Babs. Warner Bros. cancels whole-ass movies starring her**. Birds of Prey (2020) flat-out forgets that she ever existed. And don’t get me started on Batman: The Killing Joke (2016). Let’s just say that sometimes I feel something less than ambivalent about the animated adaptations of beloved Batman stories.

The Turtles here are well-drawn, feeling modern but occasionally hearkening back to some of their well-known adventures. Better still, they’re all in awe of Batman (Baker, pulling double duty as Wayne and the Joker, and somehow evoking an essence of Conroy and Hamill in the process), and that feels incredibly relatable. I also think Donatello (Baron Vaughn) has a all-vibes crush on Barbara Gordon, which is almost too relatable.

The mashing of these two worlds may not feel like they would go together, but there’s something very nice about putting Batman in a state of discomfort. The re-worked comic covers over the ends credits replace the Outsiders of the 1980s with the Turtles, and that feels like an incisive parallel. We don’t get enough Batman stories that put him as the unlikely center of mismatched a team. There should be more.

The whole film becomes sort of charming, in the end. It’s no Batman: Mask of the Phantasm (1993), but it may just end up being my second favorite Batman animated film. The things I will do if Barbara Gordon is given her fair shot to shine.

How did I get through this whole review without complaining about how adding “vs.” to a movie title obscures the fact that it inevitably amounts to “this set of characters and this other set of characters initially have a disagreement and then decide that they must band together to combat a common foe.”

Well, I guess I just did.

*You can look forward to my inevitably less-than-enthused review of Batman: Knightfall sometime next year.

**When will I get over that? The answer is never.

Batman: The Long Halloween - Deluxe Edition (2021)

Director: Chris Palmer

Cast: Jensen Ackles, Josh Duhamel, Naya Rivera, Billy Burke

Have I Seen it Before: So, it’s an odd thing. Where to begin? I’ve seen <Batman: The Long Halloween - Part I (2021)>, but never watched the second part. Cut to a year later, and I picked up the deluxe edition—containing both parts 1 and 2–so it’s an unusual situation to answer the question which starts all of these reviews with a resounding “sort of.” Oddly enough, ever since <The Flash (2023)>, I’ve been on a semi-unintentional sabbatical from all Bat-media. Couldn’t even quantify why this is the thing that broke the logjam, but here we are.

Did I Like It: I’ve been resoundingly on the record largely not caring for the recent spate of DC animated movies trying to adapt some of the longer runs from the comic books. Ultimately, the experience is left wanting and in the interest of not belaboring the point, these films have often led me to think that the adventures of the Caped Crusader were inherently more suited to the funny books than any other format. I remember liking both part of the Batman - The Dark Knight Returns (2013) because that gave the story at hand more time to breathe.

And such is the case here, spreading The Long Halloween—arguably my favorite Bat-story—over two parts allows it to not cut anything crucial out of the story. It tells the long-form story of Batman against the madness of his city, with the typical Rogue’s Gallery only playing supporting roles. The problem there is my first reaction to reading the graphic novel years ago: This would make a great movie. And it has. A couple of times. <The Dark Knight (2008)> gives a gritty realism to the downfall of Harvey Dent. Any leftover material with the Falcones and a legitimate serial killer story was taken up by <The Batman (2022)>. Do we really need another adaptation of the story? I wonder…

And that’s largely where I landed in my review of just the first half of the story, so I’m sad to say the second half doesn’t elevate the material like one might have hoped.

Batman: Year One (2011)

Director: Sam Liu, Lauren Montgomery

Cast: Bryan Cranston, Ben McKenzie, Eliza Dushku, Jon Polito

Have I Seen it Before: Yeah… I mean, I know that I’ve read the source material a couple of times, and I’m, like, 75% sure I watched the movie at some point.

Did I Like It: This really should have worked. Other animated DC films have attempted the unenviable task of translating—that should probably read jamming—stories of epic scope into runtimes which can only be feebly called a feature-length runtime. Here, a four issue miniseries seems apt for the adaptation. One could conceivably read the entirety of the series in the time it would take to watch a movie.

And yet, this one doesn’t work for me. Maybe I’m just fundamentally underwhelmed by the level of animation available for a direct-to-DVD release. Maybe I blanche at the idea of fully going along with anything Frank Miller does anymore, after he wrapped himself up in fascism and rationalizing it away as libertarianism, and the book itself wouldn’t hit the same way any more (to say nothing of revisiting The Dark Knight Returns or any other Miller-Bat-book). Miller might have chilled out a bit again in recent years. The jury is still out on that assessment, but in any event, damage to his reputation has already been done.

No, the real flaw is the casting. McKenzie never feels like Batman, which is probably right on the money as the first line of his obituary is likely going to be his portrayal of Jim Gordon in Gotham*. Miscasting the central role is bad enough, but even the casting decisions which are right on the money feel like they are poorly served. Both Cranston as Gordon to Dushku as Selina Kyle could have easily played their roles in a live action production, but instead feel like they are phoning in their performances. I honestly don’t blame them. The only performer who manages to pull off anything resembling magic is Polito in the relatively small role Commissioner Loeb. While watching, I would have sworn Ed Asner was actually playing the role, much to the late Polito’s credit.

*Which, even as of this typing is a show for which I have tried desperately, but continued failing, to amass any affinity.

Batman vs. Two-Face (2017)

Director: Rick Morales

Cast: Adam West, Burt Ward, William Shatner, Julie Newmar

Have I Seen it Before: Oh, sure. I was right on top of getting this when it came out on disc.

Did I Like It: The one missing element of 1966 Batman TV series was its treatment of that singular villain in the Rogue’s Gallery, Two-Face. Harlan Ellison wrote a treatment for an eventual episode to feature the great bifurcated one*, and the name bandied about for the role was none other than a famous-but-not-quite-that-famous Clint Eastwood. Had NBC picked up the show, we might very well have seen that come to pass.

But forget all that. Eastwood’s not the man to play the role against West and Ward. If nothing else, putting James T. Kirk in his prime against the Caped Crusader was the best possible casting move in any direct-to-DVD animated film I could ever imagine.

…as I type that, it feels like damning the film with faint praise, but I assure you, it isn’t.

This film extends everything that worked (and a few of the things that didn’t work out so hot; sorry, Burt Ward) about Batman: Return of the Caped Crusaders (2016). It also manages to make more extensive use of Jeff Bergman’s narrator, doing his best impression of the late producer William Dozier. The manic humor may be diminished ever so slightly as the regular rogue’s gallery becoming supporting characters and the story desperately tries to give Harvey (Shatner) some pathos to play.

But these are extraordinarily minor complaints for a film which easily clears its modest goals. There was no reason to expect any more time spent with Adam West as Batman, to say nothing of seeing that version of the character venturing into previously untouched material. Were Mr. West still with us, I would have been up for a new bright, campy adventure with those two every year or so.

*It was produced as a comic book, that I had to spend a minute search for and plan on re-reading as soon as possible. It’s pretty unrelated to the story presented in this film, otherwise Ellison. just might have sued the production into oblivion.

Batman: Return of the Caped Crusaders (2016)

Director: Rick Morales

Cast: Adam West, Burt Ward, Julie Newmar, Steven Weber

Have I Seen it Before: Oh, man. I was there with bells on when the movie had a limited run with Fathom. I was 100% the audience for this film.

Did I Like It: And it mostly meets expectations. The animation style is by and large fine, but I do think there was some unnecessary liberties taken with some of the locations. It would have been far more enjoyable to have the backgrounds look exactly like Bruce Wayne’s den, the Batcave, and Commissioner Gordon’s office, than the slightly more expansive environments we’re treated to here. I also didn’t need even an oblique exploration of just what occurs to get Bruce Wayne (West) and Dick Grayson (Ward) into costume as they slide down the bat-poles.

I’d hate to get entirely nitpicky about the whole affair, but the voicework is occasionally great, an occasionally not-so-great. West certainly sounds much older than he did in the 60s, but as I am currently older now than Bruce Wayne is traditionally depicted, there was a certain simple pleasure in being able to look upon the Dark Knight as a grown-up again. Julie Newmar doesn’t sound as if she’s aged a day since she last meow-ed her way through an episode of the TV show, which is worth the price of viewing the film itself. Burt Ward is… well, he’s playing a 16-year-old boy, and there’s never a moment where I wasn’t aware he was a man in his 70s. To have a man in his 70s play a 16-year-old boy is probably an unfair expectation for someone. Then again, it wasn’t like we bought him as a teenager in the 60s, either…

Filling in for deceased cast members, things get a bit brighter. Jeff Bergman channels both Cesar Romero’s Joker and narrator William Dozier nearly perfectly, although the narrator is tragically underused. Steven Weber and Lynne Marie Stewart are so perfect as Alfred and Aunt Harriet that it’s downright spooky. Wally Wingert intermittently imitates Frank Gorshin quite well, but unfortunately only illuminates just what a simmering explosion of crazy Gorshin was.

But why no Batgirl? Yes, Yvonne Craig had passed away, but everybody else is here? Why does Barbara Gordon always get the short shrift in DC movies? I just don’t get it.

The plot is epic enough to justify the runtime, but isn’t quite the comic scenario they cooked up for Batman (1966).

I might have some minor quibbles with the film, but any time spent with the Bright Knight is time well spent, especially because we aren’t going to get any more.

Batman: The Long Halloween (Part 1) (2021)

Director: Chris Palmer

Cast: Jensen Ackles, Josh Duhamel, Naya Rivera, Billy Burke

Have I Seen it Before: Na… It’s new. I’ve read the book probably half a dozen times over the last twenty years.

Did I Like It: I’ve always been a little down on the DC animated movies. Their attempts to condense the great comic arcs into a movie less than an hour and a half always left me just wanting to read the books themselves. The Dark Knight Returns Part One and Two (2012, 2013) had something to it, Hush (2019) underwhelmed, and Death in the Family (2020) struck me as quite possibly the most frustrating bat-film ever produced.

So where does this one land in that spectrum? Somewhere in the middle. Giving the story two parts lets it breath a bit, especially when the source material is a limited run, and not a year-long (or multi-year) storyline. I have some vague ambition to track down part two now, so my interest in the adaptation hasn’t abated from my morbid curiosity about this first installment. The performances are on average, pretty average. Anyone other than Kevin Conroy playing Batman/Bruce Wayne in an animated production always feels like a misstep, and Ackles does the thankless job of not drawing attention to himself. Troy Baker, on the other hand, so desperately apes the timbre, cadence, and cackle of Mark Hamill that the homage only made me long for the original more. Jack Quaid brings all of his squirrely energy to Alberto Falcone. You may think mentioning a side character isn’t worth the word count in this review, but… Well, you just need to take in the story for yourself.

Just how you might end up taking in that story brings me to the big point.I still end up falling just shy of a complete recommendation of the film. When I first read the graphic novel all those years ago, I made the remark that it would make a great Batman movie. And it did. With some shift in focus, it was called The Dark Knight (2008). Go watch that movie, or go read the graphic novel. They’re far more worthy of your time.

Batman: Death in the Family (2020)

Director: Brandon Vietti

Cast: Bruce Greenwood, Vincent Martella, John Dimaggio, Gary Cole

Have I Seen it Before: No, but I’ve read the comic series. I’ve also felt underwhelmed by many of these DC animated adaptations, so I’m left with a number of questions as I start the movie. The obvious question is will the end of Robin be as violent as it was back in the 80s? Is that even something I want to see? But the other questions I have are far more pressing. Will HBOMax keep the interactive feature advertised (the main thing drawing my attention in the first place)? Will the story continue past the (somewhat Schrödinger-esque) death of Jason Todd and include Iran appointing Joker as their ambassador to the UN? Honestly, that’s the wilder story to tell, giving that character diplomatic immunity.

Did I Like It: Ooh, boy, no. The answer to all of the questions are a resounding no. Not only is the supposed interactive element of the film removed, we are subjected to a short that is apparently just one of the possible endings of the film, and that ending culminates largely in a flashback to the events of Batman: Under the Red Hood (2010). I’ll admit that it might have been too much to hope for the Joker-at-the-UN storyline. I’d even be willing to accept if it the film presented the various endings to me, minus the interactivity. This, however, is not what I wanted when I clicked. The rest of the feature run time is padded out with additional shorts featuring Sgt. Rock (Karl Urban), Adam Strange (Charlie Weber), and possibly others. I’m not sure. I turned off the film somewhere in the middle of the Strange story.

Normally, I wouldn’t even finish a review if I couldn’t finish the film, but I did watch the above titled film, so I’m going through with expressing my disappointment. Actually, disappointment barely begins to cover it. The film on its own merits is a letdown, and the packaging of the film is a disappointment bordering on false advertising. 

When was the last time I saw a Batman movie that didn’t underwhelm? The Dark Knight Returns animated movie? Maybe. It’s probably been since 2008, realistically. Here’s the deal DC: Call me when Keaton is back on duty, not before.

Batman: Hush (2019)

Director: Justin Copeland

Cast: Jason O’Mara, Jennifer Morrison, Geoffrey Arend, Jerry O’Connell

Have I Seen it Before: I’ve certainly read it a couple of times.

Did I Like It: Really, truly, an adaptation of the Hush storyline from the Batman comic books of the is a wonderful idea, not necessarily because of the events surrounding the new enemy Hush, but because the sprawling storyline manages to make the lions share of the Dark Knight’s rogue’s gallery vital supporting characters to a larger story.

But that story took the better part of a year to tell correctly and give everyone their due. Jamming it all into a package less than 90 minutes allows for the film to go through a halfway decent plot synopsis, but the magic of those books is gone.

This has been an ongoing problem with the ongoing slate of direct-to-video DC animated films. Hush suffers from many of the same problems that dragged down both The Death of Superman (2018) and Reign of the Supermen (2019), and it’s no wonder why, as this appears to be a spinoff of those two films, featuring much of the same cast reprising their roles. The film also wastes several minutes of its screen time apparently setting up some Ra’s al Ghul storyline for a future film that—by the time it becomes available for streaming on the DC Universe app—I’ll have long since cancelled my membership. As it turns out the brief turn into the world of the Lazarus Pit turns out to be a quick way to tie Hush, the Riddler, and the final act together in as few minutes as possible.

Unlike the wobbly and problematic adaptation of Batman: The Killing Joke (2016), this film can’t even offer voice talent that has become ubiquitous with DC animation over the last thirty years. All of those present are game and give the characters the needed distinctive tone, but I’d be far more forgiving of the film if Kevin Conroy played Batman and Mark Hamill returned to play Joker. Granted, the Clown Prince of Crime is not much more of a cameo role in this story, but it would have given Hamill far more to do than he had in either Star Wars – Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015) or Star Wars – Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker (2019). It doesn’t help matters much that the actors who are playing the roles are trying their best to sound like the people who have been iconic in the roles in the past.

Every time Warner Bros. announces an adaptation of one of these beloved storylines, I allow myself to get a little bit excited by the prospect. As I type this, The Long Halloween is in development. I should probably surpass my inner Charlie Brown, opt not to kick Lucy’s proffered football, and just re-read the original comic book instead.