Superman II (theatrical cut) (1980)

Director: Richard Lester*

Cast: Gene Hackman, Christopher Reeve, Ned Beatty, Margot Kidder

Have I Seen it Before: Sure. I mean, I don’t think I’ve watched this theatrical cut since the release of Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut (2006).

Did I Like It: There was a time when I would place this film above Superman (1978), but I’m not sure I feel the same way now. Focusing the plot in on Zod (Terence Stamp) makes the whole thing have a flow that the first film doesn’t have, with all its bouncing around from B-sci-fi movie, to John Ford on the farm, before finally becoming the superhero movie it had promised.

What I think it really does is make the text idiot-proof. This version of the movie still works, but there’s a better version out there**. All I can hear now are the long shots with Luthor far in the background where somebody’s doing a B-minus impression of Hackman for the ADR, or the B-minus copy of a John Williams score***, and it all culminates in that moment where Superman (Reeve) wraps up the whole plot by befuddling his enemies with a cellophane shield****.

Ultimately, the whole thing is kind of a B-minus affair. The series is going to take a real dip from here on in, but I think maturing might be coming to the realization that the ’78 original is the better film…

In as much as maturing can incorporate opinions about superhero movies.

*I’d use this opportunity to lodge my protest about the whole Lester/Donner kefuffle, but there’s no way we’re going to get out of this review without hitting the top a handful of times anyway.

**And it’s not like the Donner cut is without flaws. There’s a whole-ass scene (it’s crucial, and a far better way for Lois to prove Clark is Superman than what we have here) that’s just taken from Reeve and Kidder’s screen test.

***At least this film is being honest about who’s doing the music here. I’m looking in your direction, Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (1987).

****Honestly don’t remember if that shield thing appears in the director’s cut, and at this point, I don’t really want to check.

Superman III (1983)

Director: Richard Lester

Cast: Christopher Reeve, Annette O’Toole, Richard Pryor, Robert Vaughn

Have I Seen it Before: Yes.

Did I Like It: Along with Supergirl (1984), this film is a cheap, sort of depressing affair. It constantly reminds one that the high highs of Superman (1978) are far in the past. And yet, both films have aged better than their initial reputations, thanks in no small part to the absolutely stunning disaster of a film that is Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (1987).

Unfortunately, this film has a little bit more going against it. As much as it benefits from how terrible its successor it is, it is made worse by the over-validation of the theatrical cut of Superman II (1980). There is much in that film to love, but re-hiring Lester to direct this film implied that all of his contributions to II were the right choices, when everything about that film that works came from the work of Richard Donner before he was fired by the Salkinds. That ignominious firing and the ensuing fallout relegates Margot Kidder to nothing more than a cameo, and it very nearly feels like she’s only accidentally in the film at all. 

It also forces Gene Hackman out of the film entirely, in favor of a character that I would bet a substantial amount of money had been Lex Luthor in earlier drafts, and the filmmakers couldn’t be bothered to fundamentally change the character to some other type of villain. They could have gone for something truly different, like Brainiac or even followed through on the beginnings of Bizarro that they have here, and really let Reeve play the villain and the hero.

But they didn’t

The resulting film is a wall-to-wall festival of camp. It is only fitfully funny in its larger physical comedy set pieces, and largely falls flat during any other attempts at banter or bits straight out of a sitcom. Yes, I do still believe a man can fly here; they hadn’t yet gotten the idea to slash the budget to shreds. Reeve is doing good work here, and his fights with a darker version of himself are the highlight of the film, if only they could have appeared in a different film.

This also, for reasons passing anything resembling understanding, is essentially a Richard Pryor movie. I’m going to reach for a potentially unpopular opinion and say that while Pryor is absolutely one of the great stand-up comics of all time, he was never much of a movie actor. He’s not terribly funny here, either, so despite his prominent presence in the film, he is just one more joke that doesn’t quite land.