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    • ORSON WELLES OF MARS
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    • A LOSS FOR NORMALCY
    • RIGHT - A NOVEL OF POLITICS
    • Beyond the Cabin in the Woods
    • THE HOLODECK IS BROKEN
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A Blog About Watching Movies (AKA a Blog in Search of a Better Title)

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings (2001)

Mac Boyle September 18, 2021

Director: Peter Jackson

Cast: Elijah Wood, Ian McKellan, Liv Tyler, Viggo Mortensen

Have I Seen it Before: Sure. Hell, I was there on opening weekend. That was mainly because there wasn’t much else to do on that particular Friday night. If you happened to be in that particular auditorium, I was the one who laughed when Frodo (Wood) used the alias Mr. Underhill.

But that was only because it was the same alias Chevy Chase used at the country club in Fletch (1985).

Yes, I was that guy. It’s nice to see you again. I sure hope I didn’t ruin the movie for you.

Did I Like It: Look, I’m not the guy for Tolkien. Yes, I’ve read the books, but only recently. I’m not much for world building for the sake of world building, thus the Middle Earth canon and most of high fantasy just misses me.

But then again, this might very well be my favorite of all the Peter Jackson Tolkien films. I think that’s mainly because, for all of the sturm and drang that accompanies these stories, I always feel the proceedings lose something imminently pleasant when they leave the shire. I want to stay there and be among the hobbits. I’m not much for farming, but a good meal, and enough peace and quiet to write a book or seven suits me just fine. These adventures we keep getting dragged on run just a bit too long, and searches for far too many endings than one story ought to hold. Yes, the pictures are pretty. Yes, the actors play their parts well. Yes, the music is stirring. But I think I’ll stay here if it’s all the same to you.

Oh, you know what? It’s become abundantly clear I’m just Bilbo. That’s why this all hits a little bit different for me. I’m Bilbo. Everyone else can carry on. I’ll see you all in the third movie.

Tags the lord of the rings: the fellowship of the ring (2001), tolkien films, peter jackson, elijah wood, ian mckellan, liv tyler, viggo mortensen
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The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies (2014)

Mac Boyle September 7, 2021

Director: Peter Jackson

Cast: Ian McKellan, Martin Freeman, Richard Armitage, Luke Evans

Have I Seen it Before: No. This one Lora and I are sure of. After shrugging our way through The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (2013), there may have been some desire to catch the final Middle-Earth feature film (especially from Lora, the actual Tolkien fan in the house), but somehow not a lot of followthrough.

Did I Like It: Almost. The run-time is the shortest of any movie Jackson has done since The Frighteners (1996)*. That helps a lot.

However.

Smaug is dispatched in the first reel of this movie. Doesn’t that mean that the story of The Hobbit is done. Sure, Jackson could fill the return to the Shire and the consternation over the fate of the gold under the mountain for forty-five minutes, but shouldn’t we be heading out of the theater before sundown at this point?

I truly have underestimated the man’s ability—nay, pathological need—to pad things out. 

And by the end, things are dispatched with such ruthless speed, I can’t help but wonder if the slightly diminishing returns mandated some changes in the Jackson working style. Evangeline Lilly (little known fact: not played by Liv Tyler) and her love affair with a dwarf is ended with none of the pathos from the LOTR trilogy it was so thoroughly trying to ape.

It’s difficult for me to forgive a fueling sense of nostalgia for a film series I didn’t love to begins with.

Also, which five armies are we talking about here. One, dwarves. Two, men. Three, orcs. Four, elves.

Five… Five? Anyone? Gandalf (McKellan) and a handful of other LOTR characters, who spend the majority of the movie inevitably failing in their goals to forestall something we already know will happen? Bilbo alone (Freeman)? Legolas (Orlando Bloom), who still somehow appears in the film? Are we the viewers—and perhaps, more appropriately, the fans—the fifth army? I can’t readily come up with a more befuddling title for a film, mainly because I’m distracting myself with still shaking my head over this one.


*I’ve now gone two-for-three on referring to The Frighteners in my review of Hobbit films. Maybe it’s time to re-watch The Frighteners…

Tags the hobbit: the battle of the five armies (2014), tolkien films, peter jackson, ian mckellan, martin freeman, richard armitage, luke evans
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The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (2013)

Mac Boyle September 7, 2021

Director: Peter Jackson

Cast: Ian McKellen, Martin Freeman, Richard Armitage, Benedict Cumberbatch

Have I Seen it Before: …yes? This is an ongoing debate in my house. We definitely remember going to see The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012) in the theater, but I couldn’t honestly say whether my wife and I have ever seen this one.

Did I Like It: Which should tell you something.

Second movies are tricky, especially where the trilogy has any degree of planning. Star Wars - Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980) can stand on its own for the most part, but as the years go by, I’m extremely convinced Lucas had no plan as he proceeded, especially for the original trilogy. I might like Back to the Future - Part II (1989) just fine, but plenty of people view it as only part of a movie, and that’s a reasonable criticism to levy.

But when the middle part of the film is only supposed to comprise the middle portion of an entire novel? How can such a film not feel almost entirely of a second act, with the proceedings being nothing more than a cavalcade of incident rushing forth in anticipation of a catharsis that—at least theatrically—wouldn’t come for another year?

For a true analysis of how Jackson attempts to accomplish that, you might just have to wait for my review of The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies (2014). There’s some fast dealing here. Fan service pads out the runtime*, forcing Legolas (Orlando Bloom, looking ten years older, despite being sixty years younger, but don’t tell anyone) into a story he didn’t exist in before. We are stuck with a cliffhanger for cliffhangers sake, made all the more strange by…

No. You know what? You will have to wait for my review of The Battle of the Five Armies. How does it feel, Peter Jackson? How does it feel?


*Jackson actually exhibits some restraint with the runtime in this series, as each film clocks in at under three hours, but what happened, man? The Frighteners (1996) was under 2 hours. You have the ability to do this!

Tags the hobbit: the desolation of smaug (2013), peter jackson, tolkien films, ian mckellan, martin freeman, richard armitage, benedict cumberbatch
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Mr. Holmes (2015)

Mac Boyle October 20, 2020

Director: Bill Condon

Cast: Ian McKellen, Laura Linney, Milo Parker, Hiroyuki Sanada

Have I Seen it Before: Never. It’s been a sealed Blu Ray sitting on my shelf for years. As it stood, I made a conscious decision to avoid any and all Holmes pastiches, as I was busy making my own. Now, with that project nearly a year behind me, and God only knows when I will break down and return to it in some fashion, I’ve taken the opportunity to dip my toe back in the pool.

Did I Like It: Really, quite a bit. The character of Holmes is almost universally depicted as being a refined alloy of logic and ability. Even Doyle only occasionally made his detective human. The Seven-Per-Cent Solution (1976) gives him some foibles, but this is the first (and last, given his age) we see the man as someone with regret and feeling for his fellow human beings. 

McKellan cuts a believable figure at various stages of Holmes as an older man. Surely some of it is aided by makeup, but it is subtle work and I believe the man in his seventies is a distinctly different figure than what he is like at his nineties. A lot of it is in the performance. He is spry and vital in the film’s flashbacks, and withered and struggling during the main storyline. It’s an impressive performance. Eagle-eyed fans of the Sherlockana will pick up on Nicholas Rowe—of Young Sherlock Holmes (1985) fame—as Holmes in the movie old Sherlock takes in. Two Sherlocks for the price of one. You’d have to go to, well, my own work to get that kind of a bargain.

But the question persists: is it a good Sherlock film. Seeing the old man passing his time as bee-keeper is interesting enough as a character study, but sleuthing must be afoot if we’re going to spend time with him, no? I’m happy to report the mystery is quite good, but again, of a more personal nature. It doesn’t artificially insert him in his retirement into palace intrigue, it just puts what is left of his skills to the test and believably sells the tension of the story.

It will read strangely, but I am glad I waited to finally see this one. Had I watched it before The Fourth Wall, it may have stymied my creative instincts. As it stands now, I was able to take in the story on its own terms and instead just enjoy it.

Tags mr holmes (2015), sherlock holmes movies, bill condon, ian mckellan, laura linney, milo parker, hiroyuki sanada
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X-Men (2000)

Mac Boyle June 22, 2019

Director: Bryan Singer*

Cast: Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellan, Anna Paquin

Have I Seen it Before: Oh, gosh. The memories. With driver’s license freshly in hand, this was the movie I first went to see under my own power. My, how far we’ve come. I am, of course, looking in your direction, Dark Phoenix (2019).

Did I Like It: There are, of course parts that don’t age so gracefully (see that footnote), but by and large the things that were done on purpose in this film work, while the things that are simply a reality of when and under what circumstances the film was made, not so much. But then again, I’m thinking that way back in the last year of the old millennium, the ratio of things that work to those that don’t probably stayed about the same. 

If Toad (Ray Park, living his best life in the late 90s/early aughts, to be sure) stole Cyclops’ (James Marsden) visor during the fight at the train station, why does he have it back as they head to Liberty Island? I mean, I guess, he has spares… But, still.

Now that the one true nitpick I have for the film is out of the way (excluding any toads struck by lightning), let’s get to the heart of the movie. And it is truly in the heart where this series is launched with the best of intentions. As an action movie, it is a product of it’s time, trying to echo some of the sensibilities of The Matrix (1999), but only managing to mimic, not capture the leather-clad wire-jumping spirit of that film. The plot is also insubstantial to the point of floating into the wind under the slightest scrutiny. It’s a 90s movie at the beginning of a decade that wanted something else. We’d have to wait for the sequel for the series to fully deliver on that promise, and another fifteen-or-so years for it to squander that promise and go out with a whimper.

And so the film is left with casting and the interplay between the characters. Here, it is successful. Patrick Stewart reaches his cinematic destiny, bringing all of his stern, yet patient leadership (and GOAT sitting in a chair skills) as Xavier. Ian McKellan might have seemed like an odd choice to play Magneto (in fact, the sort of Adonis-like Michael Fassbender seems more on-point), but he plays the man vacillating between compromise-averse crusader and egomaniacal tyrant with a deftness that any lesser actor may have whiffed. Anna Paquin… Well, there’s something about Anna Paquin’s Rogue that reminds me of thoughts I might have had as a younger man, that might be unseemly now, although they would have been age-appropriate at the time. Let’s just say that she inhabits the vulnerability of the role fully, and I really like scarves.

And then there’s Hugh Jackman, who arrived as if from nowhere in this film as a fully-formed movie star. He almost didn’t have the role, and it’s hard not to think of how bereft Dougray Scott must feel at having just missed out on what would be a 17-year franchise and a career as one of the most bankable movie stars of all time. It might be reductive to say Jackman glowers around the film like a young Clint Eastwood, but his magic is in the interaction with the other characters. His absolute infatuation with Jean Grey (Famke Janssen) feels real, his big-brother affection for Rogue is earned in every frame, and I absolutely believes that he just doesn’t care for James Marsden.

Is this a thin film in retrospect? Probably. But it delivered on the things that could work in an X-Men film, and left the stuff that didn’t have much of a hope of translating for later entries in the series.



*It’s just going to be ugly to have to watch his credit come up in films from here on in. It is of some small comfort that, in retrospect, some of his best films may have had less to do with his contribution than we might have been previously led to believe.

Tags x-men (2000), x-men movies, bryan singer, hugh jackman, patrick stewart, ian mckellan, anna paquin
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Party Now, Apocalypse Later Industries

Where creativity went when it said it was going out for cigarettes.

Where creativity went when it said it was going out for cigarettes.