The Little Shop of Horrors (1960)

Director: Roger Corman

Cast: Jonathan Haze, Jackie Joseph, Mel Welles, Dick Miller, Jack Nicholson*

Have I Seen it Before: Never. I mean, obviously I’ve seen the eventual musical remake, but never the original. Oddly enough, the version currently available on Amazon Prime is a colorized version of the film. My immediate instinct was to run in the other direction, as colorization of black and white films always strikes me as a bit overtly odious. Then again, I can’t honestly say I’ve ever actually sat down and watched a colorized version of a black and white film, so why not? Could it really be that bad?

Did I Like It: Yep. Colorization is very, very bad. Maybe other endeavors have been even marginally less distracting, but this job done on a film now in the public domain was not doing anyone any favors. Those colors injected into the proceedings were too muted to add anything to what Corman and company had already created, and if that weren’t enough those long-since-abandoned attempts at colorization really didn’t have the whole thing figured out. Occasional frames would occasionally revert back to the black and white original, perpetually giving this viewer a disoriented feeling which in no sense was designed by the filmmakers.

Aside from presentation problems, any sort of B-movie has to be approached less as something more than the sum of its parts, and more a search for those parts which might transcend the limitations. The whole package may not be completely satisfying, but there are moments of fun. Some of the dialogue is deeply deranged in a way that makes one a little uncertain they heard what they actually heard. As mentioned in that footnote, any time spent with Dick Miller (and Jackie Jospeh, no less!) or Jack Nicholson** js always a good time.

But still, if you’re ever stumped for trying to find an example of a remake that is better than the original from which it sprang, I think I may have cracked the case for you.

*Genuinely, desperately torn about who should get the fourth billing in this review between Miller and Nicholson. I have a tremendous affection for both. Eventually opted for both. I can make those kind of in-house style changes on the fly: I’m good with the owner.

**Playing delightfully against type, probably because

Gremlins (1984)

Director: Joe Dante

Cast: Zach Galligan, Phoebe Cates, Hoyt Axton, Dick Miller

Have I Seen it Before: Oh, certainly.

Did I Like It: There are two types of Gremlins fans. The Danteians, and the Columbites. The first group will show up for the series* for the chaos of it all. They might be part Gremlins themselves, if we dared to map their genome. They may like this film, but they love Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990). The Columbites view the original film as a grim exercise in suburban horror. They live for the Santa-in-the-chimney monologue. They think this film is better if Mr. and Mrs. Futterman (Miller and Jackie Joseph) died at the end of Mr. Futterman’s plow. They think the second film is silly.

Only one group is right, and you’re not going to need two guesses to find out into which camp I fall.

Sure, the rules governing the balance between Mogwai and Gremlin make no sense, and we’ll have to wait for a whole additional movie before that absurdity is embraced, but it’s not entirely this film’s fault that its sequel completely eats its lunch I can never look upon Kingston Falls and not be taken completely out of the film. It’s Hill Valley, and they’re absolutely shooting on the Universal backlot, but this film actually precedes Back to the Future (1985).

The creature effects here age poorly, but we know they do get better. That’s just six years worth of progress working against this film. If you think that I’m just being needlessly negative about the film, I think Warner Bros. tends to agree with me. Almost every promotional image of Gizmo for this film is actually an image of him from the sequel.

But even if this film is written by Chris Columbus and can’t help but reflect his ethos, Joe Dante can’t help but author some portions of the film. The villains’ collective decision to cease their reign of terror in favor of a late night screening of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves (1937) is peak chaotic energy, and fundamentally makes the film a comedy, regardless of what Mr. Columbus may have typed all those years ago. Then there’s, my favorite scene when Mr. Pelzer (Axton) is calling home from the inventor’s convention. Robby the Robot (from Forbidden Planet (1956) is there. The Time Machine (from George Pal’s The Time Machine (1969) is there (and then it isn’t). It’s just a little bit of chaos leaking into the film. IS it enough to raise it above the sequel in my estimation? No, but it is an appetizer to the feast that is soon to follow.

*By the way, HBOMax, while we’re on the subject… I was promised an animated Gremlins series in 2021. Joe Dante himself was consulting with it. What happened there? The internet seems to think that it will now come some time in 2022… I guess we’ll see.