The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)

Director: Aaron Horvarth, Michael Jelenic

Cast: Chris Pratt, Anya Taylor-Joy, Charlie Day, Jack Black

Have I Seen it Before: Well, here’s the thing, if you’ll forgive me for getting into the review right away. As much as people—and by “people”, I also include both the corporation and creative professionals behind this movie—have looked down on Super Mario Bros. (1993) in the last thirty years, both of these films feel the need to start with nearly the same presence. Mario (Pratt, strangely not nearly as miscast as he appeared on spec) and Luigi (Day) are brave but put-upon Brooklyn plumbers who are pulled into a adventure taking place in a myserious world existing below the New York they know, with the help of a princess (Taylor-Joy) to put a stop to the evil plans of a… guy?… who might be alternatively called Bowser or Koopa, depending on the territory.

Those are the same movies, right? It wasn’t like establishing the brothers in our world was something with which the video games never seemed to bother.

Did I Like It: Aside from that strange parallel to its predecessor, I had to say I was pleasantly surprised by the majority of the film. As I said, Pratt wasn’t nearly as bad as he could have been. The rest of the cast equates itself well, and up until the moment he starts signing, Black is completely unrecognizable in the role. The humor and adventure are well-calibrated to not unduly favor one over the other. That feels like its a complaint, as if it couldn’t be bothered to be interesting, for fear of failing in the attempt, but I understand where they are coming from after everything that happened with the live action attempt. It is a safe, inoffensive piece of entertainment.

In fact, the only particular complaint I can reach for is the strange preponderance of needle drops littered throughout the film. “No Sleep till Brooklyn” might feel like it belongs in the movie, but it’s the Beastie Boys (I’m usually against them showing up anywhere in film, just see <Star Trek (2009)>, but they’re already in Brooklyn when it plays, and I’ve managed to beat all of the NES Mario games, but I apparently lack the skills to understand what “Take on Me” is doing here, other than the fact that the rights holders for a-ha are hard up for cash and willing to let it go for next to nothing.

Pacific Rim (2013)

Director: Guillermo del Toro

Cast: Charlie Hunnam, Idris Elba, Rinko Kikuchi, Charlie Day

Have I Seen it Before: Oh, sure.

Did I Like It: I’m writing this review shortly after my post about <Cloverfield (2008)>, which I wasn’t very kind to.

I like this movie more, if for no other reason than it is just about the only big budget adventure film of the last decade that wasn’t based on some other property. I’m supposed to be thrilled when films aren’t based on board games, but this film actually creates a whole new world that feels lived in, not terribly removed from our own, and unique enough to not feel like every other film in the genre. The monsters of Pacific Rim are not the spindly Lovecraftian horrors of Cloverfield, or even the lumbering suited men of the Godzilla series. Instead, while wild, they do seem to have intelligence. They certainly have a plan and an agenda, which might undercut the terror one might feel, but I think only amplifies their ruthless threat.

Far more importantly, the film is not unrelentingly bleak.

That is to say, it is not totally devoid of bleakness. The film depicts the calamitous turning point in humanity’s fight with kaiju taking place in 2020, which kinda sorta figures. The world careens closer and closer to outright annihilation over the ensuing half a decade. The heroes band together, seal the breach, and win the day. While the world is still devastated from years of unrelenting onslaught, there is the hope that a new day is just around the corner.

But then there’s a sequel, which was bland, inoffensive, and a real let down from the highs displayed here. I’m not sure why Hollywood doesn’t just let del Toro do whatever the hell he wants at any given moment, but that doesn’t feel like it will change any time soon. That should have been the lesson from this film. Not more of the same. More of del Toro.