Flash Fiction Story 047: The Shopping List

To: Kevin@TOOTH.org

From: Jörg.admin@TOOTH.org

Re: Shopping List

Kevin,

Before you come by, would you mind grabbing a few things? Things have been hectic here, and I haven’t had a chance to get to the store.

~Jörg

Lemons

Mustard

Grapes (green, as long as they’re firm, otherwise red)

Hamburger Helper

Batteries

Plutonium

If the store is out of plutonium, any of the actinide metals will work in a pinch, but we’ll have to add:

Paprika

Henchmen

One Big Guy

One Little Quiet Guy

One Guy Who Is Proficient With Nunchaku or some other equivalent melee weapon (if he is also the big guy, also grab a squirrelly guy in glasses, as long as it isn’t anyone with a Political Science degree)

Two Helicopters, both with my face painted on them. (Don’t forget the coupon)

The missing pages from the Tome of Eternal Doom. (Bring a shaman with you, even if you have to kidnap them. Otherwise, it’s going to be a whole thing.)

1 lb. ground turkey

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